Author Archive | frank

pokerface

The Illusion of Transparency

by / / 70 posts

The illusion of transparency is perhaps the most important tool the Velominatus has in their toolbox, apart from having some measure of competence, being Casually Deliberate at all times, Looking Fantastic, and being able to dish out and endure heaping helpings of The V. Cycling is suffering, and one of the most crucial lessons we…

Recovery Ale Recepticle

Post-Ride Recovery Ales

by / / 145 posts

The most important moment in a man’s life is the first time they have a beer. I place it on the list above sex and having a child because sex usually only happens as a direct result of drinking beer. As for having children, I’m given to understand they are poop factories at first, then…

In Memoriam: Il Pirata, Ten Years Gone

by / / 69 posts

I don’t know if its because I see something of myself in them or if it awakens some kind of nurturing instinct, but I always seem to find myself drawn to tragically flawed figures. Layne Staley and Marco Pantani strike me as two halves of the same whole; incredibly talented yet tortured with mortally addictive personalities,…

Looking fast. Photo: Pedale.Forchetta

To Look Good is Already to Go Fast

by / / 129 posts

To look good is already to go fast. -Paul Fournel, Vélo My approach to research is pretty straight forward. First, I develop an opinion – usually in a cognitively compromised state. This is the first step in the process for the simple reason that it avoids the bulk of the hard work involving things like…

A cold morning ride on Keepers Tour 2013. Photo: Brett Kennedy

Look Pro: Dress for Success

by / / 215 posts

I recently overheard someone say that there is no such thing as bad weather, just bad clothing. This is the kind of statement that makes me want to hate people as a species a little bit. Of course there such a thing as bad weather. There are also bad people (loads of them), bad ideas (even…

This man isn't about to quit; that's V Face right there.

On Rule #6: Resistance

by / / 113 posts

Strength can be a fickle thing this time of year, when the training isn’t as consistent as it should be; it comes and goes, sometimes several times in the span of a single ride or even a climb. Like a rosy-eyed dreamer I keep awakening as I train, thrown like a rag doll between a state…

1984Kelly_Liege

La Vie Velominatus: Ugly Ducklings

by / / 67 posts

We’re an odd bunch, us Cyclists. Shaved legs, scars, tan lines, muscular legs paired to scrawny upper bodies. These things that make us stand out are some of the things I take great pride in. I marvel at my freshly shaved guns and how smooth they feel under my dress clothes when I’m stuck at…

A 10 speed cluster; too many choices or not enough?

Les Choix

by / / 156 posts

I’ve never been able to decide if choices are a gift or a curse; a lack of choices introduces simplicity but also with it the risk that the simple choices do not meet the demands of a complex world. An abundance of similar choices, on the other hand, often reduces the impact of getting things…

The LeMond Revolution

Reverence: LeMond Revolution

by / / 137 posts

I read recently that a number of Pros like to ride the turbo for an hour or so before having breakfast in the morning to jump start the old metabolic system. Which means that now I ride the trainer for an hour in the morning before breakfast. I think the Pros probably do it to lose…

Just Right...

The Goldilocks Principle: Valve Stem Length

by / / 102 posts

The Goldilocks Principle is under assault, balance is lost. Without balance, we are reduced to savages. Steerectile dysfunction is spreading like wildfire; socks are quickly becoming knee-highs and the line between shorts and knickers continues to blur. We spend considerable time making everything on our loyal steed fit and look perfect. Bar tape and tire…

An early morning ride on Keepers Tour 2013. Photo: Brett Kennedy

La Vie Velominatus: The Gifts of Rule #9

by / / 150 posts

We’re not really supposed to have favorites, but everyone does. Just ask your parents. So while I’m not supposed to have a favorite, I do, and its Rule #9. Bad weather immediately separates the wheat from the chaff, and so the weekend warriors stay indoors and leave the roads to the devout. I talk most…

Fabs over-drafts the V-Bank account.

The 2013 V-Moment of the Year

by / / 92 posts

2013 was The Year of the Anti-V. In every other year, the Velominati Cogclave to decide the V and The Anit-V awards is full of curses and thrown pint glasses, usually in defense of each of our chosen V-Moments. 2013 saw the same scene, except this time it was for us having too many competing…

CharlyMottet

On Rule #36: Cool Shades

by / / 56 posts

Forget quick-release skewer, the mechanical derailleur, carbon frames, or disc wheels. Never mind clipless pedals or brake-mounted shifters. Scratch those deep-section road wheels, lightweight helmets, or miracle fabrics. The most important innovation in Cycling had nothing to do with those incremental advances, but rather with the invention of Cycling-Specific eyewear. To begin with, they allowed…

Merckxy Christmas and a Coppi New Year!

Merckxy Christmas and Coppi New Year!

by / / 34 posts

To each of you in our Community, we’d like to thank you for making Velominati a worthwhile place to visit and be a part of. Velominati, as most of you know, is a passion project that is borne of our nights and weekends, to be juggled between full time jobs, family, friends, and our first…

Original photograph by Latryx

Out of Darkness

by / / 34 posts

The dark makes everything worse; something primal awakens in us when the sun has gone and we are wrapped in the black cloak of night. Laying in bed, my worst thoughts and fears come knocking like some used-car salesperson who won’t leave me alone. There is no shutting down of this process, our imaginations are…

You don't Look this Fantastic by being sensible all the time.

Of Course, But Maybe

by / / 86 posts

I’m a naturally loud and weird person who expresses excitement through volume. Also, alcohol is supposed to be a depressant, but it doesn’t appear to work for me; all it does is make me happier (and louder) – until I have a little too much at which point I get weirder (a too-happy, too-loud kind of…

A pair of Café Roubaix Arenburgs, with the original "Richter" branding.

The Legend of @Dan_R and Café Roubaix

by / / 88 posts

Although he was already an active community member, I began my friendship with Dan Richter in early 2012 after he reached out to me regarding some wheels he wanted us to take along on Keepers Tour: Cobbled Classics 2012. At the time, he was an amateur wheel builder making some money on the side selling…

P1040670

From Café To Roubaix

by / / 153 posts

Assuming you ride somewhere outside the borders of Antarctica, you have likely already heard about the injustice being imposed on our friend and fellow Velominatus, Dan Richter who goes around these parts as @Dan_R. I’ve been riding Dan’s wheels for a bit over a year, and they are the best I’ve ever had. After hearing…

Gelukkig Sinterklaasavond

by / / 28 posts

Today is a special day for two reasons. First, it is Sinterklaas Avond, an important holiday in the Netherlands and Belgium. Second, it marks the launching of a new feature for Velominati which we are calling the Kermis.  A Kermis is a carnival usually marked by a criterium bicycle race held around the perimeter of the festival…

T-Bone Farrar and Johan "Big Ring" Vansummeren ride in the elements. Photo: Pedale.Forchetta

The Elements

by / / 137 posts

Water is an asshole, at least when it comes to bicycles. So is wind, now that I think of it; I don’t love it, unless its at my back, but that rarely seems to happen even on out-and-back routes. Fire’s not winning any prizes either, unless you’re talking about the hunk-a-hunka burnin’ V. Even le soleil…