Archive | Musings from the V-Bunker

Cleanliness is next to the velodrome

The Shower

by / / 45 posts

As far as Cycling and racing iconography goes, Paris-Roubaix sits at the very zenith. It’s the most revered race among fans not only because of the pavé and the punishment it hands out, but there’s also the traditional finish of the race in the old velodrome, and what are possibly the most photographed showers anywhere in…

credit: Cyclingnews

Dialing in the Stable

by / / 22 posts

This was going to be an article about Rule #45. It is amazing how much time is wasted and matches burned when professionals stop for that second bike change to get back on their #1. With all the jigs available to team mechanics it would seem they could set up five bikes exactly the same.…

Sometimes you're the joker, sometimes you're the joked.

Ebb and Flow

by / / 35 posts

As Tyler Farrar rode by in the other direction, we gave each other a subtle wave; not the wave between friends, but between brothers of the road. On another day, I might have turned around and chased him down, like the first time I’d seen him riding locally. Not so much to bother him or to ride with…

You light up my legs, you give me hope. Photo JEFF PACHOUD/ GETTY

Lights On Legs

by / / 24 posts

Cycling is made up of hundreds of minute details, forming a larger entity which is generally simplified and viewed as the intrinsically simple act of riding––or racing––a bicycle. Getting on and pedalling, fast, may be the crux of winning the Tour, Roubaix, or the local B grade crit, but if it is held as the most important aspect, then…

Spiderman   photo: G. Watson

Spiderman and His Climbing Monkey

by / / 67 posts

How can anyone be such a great cyclist and look so ungainly on a bike? Does this not violate a basic tenet of V-philosophy? Would he not be faster if his knees and elbows were tucked in neatly, aligned with his forward motion? On riding style alone Quintana has a huge edge, he just looks…

Warming up for an hour of suffering. Photo ChrissyOne

The Quitter

by / / 76 posts

The truth is that I’d been thinking about quitting for the best part of forty-five minutes. Round and round I went on that track, every lap hurting a little bit more than the previous; every lap taking a little bit longer to complete, every lap that voice inside my head getting a little bit louder.…

The case for black socks...and orange patent leather shoes.

On Rule #28: The Case for Black Socks

by / / 127 posts

Science has proven that people who wear crazy socks are smarter than those boring snooze factories who wear simple plain socks. I know the data supporting the claims is legitimate because I read it on LinkedIn. Also, when I say “read”, I mean that I glanced briefly at the title while simultaneously performing several other critical…

Hmmmmm?    photo: @fat cyclist

When the Wheels Come Off

by / / 53 posts

This is perhaps painfully obvious to everyone but me and if so, sorry I’ve yet again wasted  your time. The other day, after falling off another floating board in the ocean I had to admit my balance might suck. And my coordination too or I might have been good enough at baseball to actually like…

K.I.S.S meets Soundgarden.

The Quick Zip Salute

by / / 68 posts

Diego Ulissi did us all a service on stage 4 of the Giro. Not only did he win in the best way possible for a rouleur with a sprint – by not having to sprint – he timed his attack so perfectly that he only had time for a split-second salute, and an even quicker…

The climber in a gorilla suit is a mysterious beast.

The Climber in a Gorilla Suit

by / / 72 posts

There is a force upon this world which governs all manner of voodoo and wizardry. This force ensures the streak in your windshield wiper is always precisely at eye level. It ensures that the phone call goes to voicemail just as you touch the “answer” button. It ensures that a product which you endlessly encountered but…

Didi Thurau, front and center

Son of a Gun

by / / 21 posts

I have gone off before about choosing your parents wisely. I wish I had been paying more attention as a youth when those options were discussed. When I saw Bjorn Thurau in the break in Amstel Gold I thought, damn, that kid is tall, he is like mini-Phinney. He is in more ways that one;…

Parijs-Tours: foto Cor Vos ©2000
Boonen Espoirs

Awesome Dutch Nerds

by / / 14 posts

Finally the Dutch are showing their true potential. No one is going to read the Friday-before-De-Ronde post unless it is an exclusive interview with Tommeke and he is not answering our IMs. Four years ago at KT2012 we were there when Boonen took Ballan and Pozzato to the line. Who would have bet against him…

Rider and car (nearly) collide on the Koppenberg in the 1987 Tour of Flanders.

On Motors and Bikes: The Next Ride

by / / 67 posts

Every time I go riding, I know I subject myself to masses of cars and motorcycles, each of which has the potential to momentarily occupy the same space my bicycle and I are occupying, a physical impossibility that Nature will resolve via a messy process involving my death. I don’t know very much about the vehicles…

Suit you, Sir?

The Suit Lining

by / / 59 posts

“A fine suit is only as good as its lining” once said someone more versed in the art of the clothier than me. They didn’t actually, I just made that up. But it sounds like it could be something that an Italian tailor would say, but I’ve never met one of those either. The point…

The boys discussing #43.

Rule #43

by / / 83 posts

I wonder if Rule #43 should be sublimated on our bibs too. It might be my most favorite Rule. Don’t be a jackass. But if you absolutely must be a jackass, be a funny jackass. Always remember, we’re all brothers and sisters on the road. As a Keeper on the Velominati site, it irritates me…

Here comes sickness.

Shit Gets Real

by / / 83 posts

Can you feel that? That itchy, twitchy feeling… that’s anticipation, it’s expectation, it’s Belgian fucking racing fever! You know you’ve got it, and you can’t fight it, you don’t want to fight it, you need it bad because it’s been way too long. Some may call it Spring Fever, Cobblebone, or Kassientitis. It manifests itself deep in…

If loin cloths could speak...

Half Man, Half Couch

by / / 64 posts

I never used to get injured. I could ride all day on hardly any water or food, under the Australian sun with nary a squirt of sunscreen, drink four beers directly after and then go and DJ and dance til the wee hours of the next morning without stretching or any form of ‘warming down’. To me,…

Phantom aero in the snow. Top marks, Michele.

Breathing Through Your Ears

by / / 65 posts

Suffering is part of Cycling the way alcohol is part of liver failure: they are obviously connected but it’s too much fun to stop and think about why you do it. Grace finds us through La Volupté, but her touch is rare and we generally are far better acquainted with her husband, The Man with the…

As a matter of fact, no, I hadn't forgotten how awesome I am.

Body Language

by / / 87 posts

A true leader rarely asks someone to do something for them; the best leaders inspire through their own example those around them to follow suit and join them in their cause. The leader is fueled by something that is not externally driven, it is born from within and appears in this world as passion and conviction. These…

These aren't the men you're looking for. Photo: Tim De Waele

Body Dysmorphia

by / / 127 posts

I am thrilled to announce that for the first time in my life, my chest measurement is smaller than my hip measurement, an accomplishment I’m not sure many men around the world would be proud to admit. A Cyclist has no use for an upper body, we’re not going about lifting things with our arms; we are…

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