When Icarus flew too close to the sun, it was more than just the heat from the sun that caused his mighty fall; it was also the brilliance of his pride. As I contemplate my next ride up the Haleakala Highway and Crater Road which leads to the summit of Haleakala, I can’t help but…
The Archives
I know the feeling, Laurent. Sometimes I just want to give the cross winds a big, “Fuck You”, too.
“The what Tour?” The question sounds less like a question and a bit more like an accusation. We’re sitting in Gianni’s home on Maui and I’ve just answered a query as to what I’m doing with a computer on my lap when the weather is too nice to justify such a thing. Even a man as…
Rule #22 is perhaps the most complicated Rule amongst the (currently) 85. Part of the complexity springs from the fact that we are all very attached to this small cotton cap. Off the bike, it was once a badge used to recognize one of our own; now it has been taken over by the hipster crowd which…
If we liked breathing stale, recycled air, we’d all take up a sport like wrestling or indoor fly-fishing. But we love the feel of a gale on our faces. We cherish the smell of cow manure filling our nostrils with its almost tangible grittiness. We hold scared the privilege to breathe in diesel fuel while…
The last Dutchman to win the KoM in le Tour was Gert-Jan Theunisse. He was also the last Dutchman to win atop Alpe d'Huez. The year was 1989 and I was too busy riding crotch-rockets, water skiing, and coiffing the plumage of my mullet to notice much else besides an American and fellow Minnesotan had…
The Velominati Super Prestige continues with it’s typical post-Tour follow up, Classica San Sebastian. The race isn’t normally given much credit, though it stands out as the first major classic of the Summer season. It’s unfortunate that the race suffers from the ill effect of being overshadowed by the Tour; if it occurred anywhere else in…
Mates are supposed to be just that; mates. They are meant to be supportive, to help you out when you need them, to make your existence a good experience. My mates want to see me suffer. A couple of these 'mates' (who shall remain nameless, but not shameless) thought it would be a good idea…
There is little in life that compares to a ride along a quiet country road. This surely is the altar of our sport, where all the greatest qualities of cycling are brought into relief by the simple act of propelling yourself along by your own power. Despite being social creatures, the experience is heightened by…
Not an absolute; the beauty of Rule #5 is the graduated scale upon which it is measured. Rule #5 means to push yourself beyond the signals your body sends to stop what you’re doing, usually with ever-increasing urgency. It means to disobey reason and to surpass physical boundaries previously considered impassable. This is why Rule…
You’d think that with such an historical event taking place in France overnight that the Australian newspapers would be a sea of yellow and ‘we are the champions’ headlines this morning. Yet what I saw staring back at me when I visited one of the most respected newspaper websites (ie not a Murdoch tome) was a…
Reach for your recovery drink of choice, grab a little massage if you can, load up on carbs tonight, and get ready for the ultimate showdown for final Tour glory tomorrow to be contested in 41 kilometers contra la montre. I’m talking about the fans, not the riders, obviously. Because these last two days have nearly…
After such an epic and, frankly, shocking (as in stunning, stupendifying and surprising) stage to the Galibier last night, it’s going to take more than a few hours to recover and get back on track for tonight’s VSP stage to the mythical L’Alpe d’Huez. I think the semantics of Stage 18 have been covered brilliantly by…
More than two of the three weeks of this Tour lie in the rearview mirror and the race is impossible to call; nearly every GC Contender has shown some kind of weakness or given something away that makes them look beatable. Contador was dropped on the first uphill finish. The Schlecks have been on the…
La Vie Velominatus is a life spent in the sway of the push and pull between function and aesthetics. The former, of course, is paramount, but not necessarily at the cost of latter. A prime example is the European Posterior Man-Satchel; many feel that its use is dictated by functionality, that to abandon the saddle bag…
Plateau de Beille has a reputation. It’s long. It’s hard. It’s steep. It’s high. And, because it’s in the Pyrenees, it’s either really hot or really wet. Although it has only been featured in the Tour four times (1998, 2002, 2004, 2007), it has quickly been placed high on the list of fabled Tour mountaintop…
I forget all maner of things these days. I forget that climbing isn’t fun; it hurts. I forget that I’m not good at it. I even forget what hurting feels like after it’s over, which I think might be at the root of why I keep going back for more. I forget my vows never…
Casually Deliberate is at the core of Looking Pro; it’s something that comes from a lifetime spent on a bike, becoming one with the machine. There are two components to this phenomenon, two organisms forming a symbiotic bond and working together in perfect harmony towards an end. The Machine. Immaculate. Every piece of kit in its place, adjusted…
The Velominati Super Prestige has historically been the work of professional bike races. We focus on the Pro races for a simple reason: we know the races and riders, so Schleculating on where our favorite riders will finish becomes a left-brain/right-brain kind of confused mess that ends with our picks looking more Picasso than they…
I did not expect the test to go well. To begin with, no beer holds up well at 96 degrees, and the Fahrenheit mercury outside of the light rail station at Arizona State University in Tempe read 96 degrees. 96 degrees stands far too close to 98.6 degrees, familiar to us all as body temperature,…